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Friday, November 29, 2019

Why do we have this toaster?

I know I have a lot to catch up on, and I will but first, let me tell you about a toaster ...

Our cook at work went on a holiday. Usually, Jo does the cooking but this particular day I volunteered/was encouraged.

I went to the kitchen with intention of making French toast. We'd been talking about it. Unfortunately, we had no butter/margarine. Hm. I found some cheez whiz and some jam. Alright. Toast it is.

I pull out some bread from the freezer after deciding we didn't really have a lot of bread thawed. Toasters thaw bread pretty good in my experience.

I put the bread in the right side of the toaster. It's a four slice toaster.

I wait. It's not … getting red. I look into the right side and frown. I fiddle a little bit. Then I put bread on the left side. It's a four slice toaster. The left side gets red right away but the right side, is suspiciously dark. I am concerned. I have a lot of bread to toast. I peer at it, fiddle some more, push the buttons more, and it clicks. Excellent.

 I may or may not have told our cook I did not fiddle with the knobs.I feel like it's taking too long so I may (or may not) have fiddled with the timer on the bottom. Suddenly the toast on the left side is looking REALLY dark. OMG. I pop it out. (may or may not have returned the knob to the proper spot). I inspect the toast. Meanwhile, the right side … pops. Kind of?

It doesn't actually come out of the toaster. So I look in there. I lift the little pusher-downer thing. Nothing. As I contemplate this, I put more bread in the left side and push it down.

 Then … OBVIOUSLY. I try to flip the toaster to get the bread out because who would NOT do that?

Before I get all the way over I remember that is a no-no and stop but too late. There is now a small fire in the toaster.

Seriously. A fire. I pop the left side and blow on the fire.

Seemed like a good idea.

It was. It went out. Now I pull the toaster and look at the right side and see the lifter thing inside is broken. No way to get that bread out.

At this point, time is ticking and I play a dangerous game with the knob on the left side and the toaster's left side. Once breakfast was served and I came back to make lunch (Whole different story about spirally hot dogs cut in 4's, swollen tomato soup noodles and pickles … and sandwiches) I pulled the stuck bread out of the toaster - after unplugging it.

Today, when I saw our cook, I asked her why the heck we still have that toaster! And I explain (mostly) what happened.

They've had it since the beginning. It's a user problem. I mean I know better now but guess what I'm asking the comité to buy us next.

0_0

I shoulda made French toast and just asked the school for butter. Or crepes. I know how to make those …